在科技论文写作中保持活力
Highlights from Chapter 4 in <<The Craft of Scientific Writing>> by Michael Alley
Sustaining energy in your writing begins with selecting strong verbs and concrete nouns. Verbs and nouns receive the heaviest accents in sentences. When those words are weak, the writing drags.
1. Select energetic verbs
Verbs provide energy in sentences. When your verbs are energetic, the writing moves.
1) Avoid having verbs occur at the ends of sentences.
Example:
In this study, the care given by a hospital and the medical outcomes of patients are compared.
Correction:
This study compares the care given by a hospital and the medical outcomes of patients.
- is presented -> present
- are discussed -> discuss
- is revealed -> reveal
- are compared -> compare
- are considered -> consider
2) Tighten your verbs
- made the arrangement for -> arranged
- made the decision -> decided
- made the measurement of -> measured
- performed the development of -> developed
- is beginning -> begins
- is dependent on -> depends on
- is following -> follows
- is shadowing -> shadows
- is a result from -> results from
- is used to detect -> detects
- there is/are -> occurs / exist
3) Select the natural voice
Two main features distinguish the action of a verb: tense and voice. Tense refers to when the action occurs: past, present, or future. Voice refers to the perspective for the action – who or what performed the action.
Making all the verbs passive slows the writing and reduces its efficiency.
Although the active voice is stronger than the passive voice, occasions arise in which the passive voice is more natural.
The key to choosing is to ask which form is more natural.
Example: On the 2nd day of our wildebeest study, the herd migrated to the river. There, a calf wandered just a few yards from the herd and was attacked by painted dogs.
One strategy is to allow objects to act.
- This paper presents…
- Figure 1 shows…
- The test setup included…
A second strategy for transforming passive voice to active voice is to use the first person (I or we).
Einstein, Pauling, Feynman, Goodall, Lyell, and Freud all used the first person in their writing.
When using the 1st person, you should reserve the use of the 1st person for those occasions in which your role in the work is important.
Second, you should avoid placing the 1st person as the beginning word.
Example: To test this process, we performed experiments in flow tubes.
2. Rely on concrete nouns
Nouns that provide one of the five senses are concrete nouns, and nouns that do not are abstract nouns.
3. Be concise
1) Eliminate redundancies
- “already” existing
- introduced a “new”
- “alternative” choices
- mix “together”
- at “the” present “time”
- never “before”
- “basic” fundamentals
- none “at all”
- “completely” eliminate
- “now” at this time
- “continue to” remain
- period “of time”
- “currently” being
- “currently” underway
- “empty” space
- start “out”
- had done “previously”
- “still” persists
2) Reduce phrases to simplest forms
- at this point in time -> now
- at that point in time -> then
- due to the fact that -> because
- has the ability to -> can
- has the potential to -> can
- in the event that -> if
- in the vicinity of -> near
- owing to the fact that -> because